I have sinned.

I was given a ludicrous-ly heavy laptop. I can bet you all my millions that the weight of the whole bag is easily at least 10% of my body weight. And I am heavy. And I DO have the millions.

The strap is of stretchy material which is fine because it sits nicely on the shoulder, but take this, my size is all wrong for it. So instead of sitting nicely, any provocation will cause it to go boing boing boing all around me. It makes me clumsy (-er). When I took it back last Friday, running down the stairs to catch the train sent it yo-yo-ing nicely around me and I almost tripped. A quick spread of the arms and butt pushed back, managed to save the day. Phew.

I wasn’t so lucky this morning coming to work. Or maybe I was lucky. Depends on how you want to look at it.

You see, today is Yamtuan’s birthday, clap clap clap. And it is a wet cold rainy slippery day. We woke up late but I insisted on having breakfast as usual with him. It is after all his birthday, the least I could do is have breakfast with him and by that, risk to be a few minutes late. Yes? No? And so I was pressed for time. The journey would take about 25 minutes and I was at the Putra Taman Jaya at precisely 0800 hours.

Heavy bag or not I had to rush.

I reached Ampang Park station with 5 minutes to spare. Rushed to the escalators. And walked up on the right side. There was this Chinese girl infront of me. She was not as fast as I wanted her to be so I was about to cut her lane from the left side when the stupid stupid laptop hit her left foot. Her sandal came off and fell a few steps down. Oh oh, you should look at the way she looked at me. Oh oh. If looks could kill they say, she would not be jailed at all! Oh no, because even though i would die then and there, she could jolly well claim for temporary insanity. I saw madness in her eyes! I said sorry sorry sorry numerous times and i did the thinkable, i fled the crime scene. Hit and run.

So you, the Chinese girl whom I have gravely wronged, I hope you are reading this. Or I hope someone will tell you this. I AM sorry. And the only reason I did not ‘go fetch’ at your bark and help you retrieve your sandal is because doing so would make me have to crouch under your skirt and that would be a more grievous crime. Especially on a Monday. I would slap my own face if i go under your skirt, i swear. Besides. doing so would probably send a few people sprawling down. The bag, you see?

The bag is a killing machine. I am returning it today. I want to walk free again. I have sinned. O help me God.