Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Past Present Future

Ely and Anedra, so this is my kisah seram.

1985, 20 years ago – I was 15
1. I was in a fully residential school in Muor.
2. I was known among the teachers as The Bertih Jagung (The Popcorn), because I wasn’t very shy and quiet.
3. Had an admirer from the leader of Geng Kepala Anjing, another 15-year old. Football player, not bad looking, had eyeliner and purple lipsticks on, as any rockers of those gender-confused years. Oh he was such a gangstah. Smoking Lucky Strike and wearing Loudness tees and all that. So all the other boys treated me with respect (or risk kena tempeleng with him) even though I never sorta ‘accepted’ him. He left the school after SRP.
4. I myself was in a group called The Rambo Star ~ whatever that means. It was a boy-hate group.
5. I was constantly hungry.
6. I was a very active member of the Outdoor Club, was forever camping and hiking here and there.
7. School was so much fun. Later in Form 4 I developed hatred towards the subject Physics and the teacher Cikgu Norliya hated me too.
8. I hated Geography too, the teacher said if I pass the subject he would eat his shoes. I got an A for SRP. He still hasn’t eaten his shoes.
9. Loved perfumed pen, erasers and notebooks!
10. Hated pink and purple, because the two colors were SO in.

1990, 15 years ago – I was 20
1. I was doing my diploma in ITM Shah Alam. It was during Acis Gersang (no no not Mona, Acis okay? Sheila Majid’s hubby?), Azhar Sulaiman and Azwan Ali years.
2. Have just discovered The Make Up – with disastrous effect.
3. Worked nights as a waitress at FC Restaurant of PKNS. Dated a pretty 17 year old boy who waited tables there too. He was such a kid he would bring Voltron figurines whenever we dated. He was SO pretty though, he preened all the time. I was Beast, he was Beauty. Did not work out, of course. He had a lot of growing up to do.
4. That guy from school? The leader of the pack? He contacted me again. Said he had brain tumor, had to quit uni (was doing political science in US), and it was the thought of me that kept him going. He fought the cancer for me. He was given only a few months to live. So ok lah, we became a couple for real (letters and phones only, never dated).
5. I hated Physics with a vengeance. And the lecturer, Puan Samirah, hated me too. I was so cursed.
6. I was always hungry.

1995, 10 years ago – I was 25
1. Just graduated from UTM Jalan Semarak.
2. Got a job with an NGO. Became an activist for the environment, holding up placards against Bakun etc. Went around the country ‘educating’ school children and colleges on environmental issues. Was such an idealist, very vocal and an avid tree-hugger. Avoided anything with batteries, always picking up litters and writing to newspapers.
3. Got my first article published in D*ewan Kosmik, on medicinal plants. My second article titled Tuah si Landak was liked so much, I was offered to write a series on endangered animals, 12 books. Contract ready but I pulled out last minute. Too busy couldn’t commit. Huge regret. Oh well!
4. Enrolled at UM for a Master Degree.
5. Was in an abusive relationship. Foolish me. Fell for him because he looked a lot like my late father. Despite the beatings, I stayed on. For years!!!!
6. The NGO office was too far from UM. Had to resign to be nearer. Started working as a chemical engineer. Design sewage treatment plants. The one in T*ropicana golf club? That was my first baby! Wooohooo! (gee, I hope the plant still runs okay..)
7. Got my first two very own columns, but in kiddies magazine lah, another Dewan publication. Yey!!! Kid stuff only but I was ecstatic!
8. Took driving class but got discouraged after one hour on the road. That GREAT famous unrivalled traffic jam in 1995? That was my doing, yes. Epicentre was Chow Kit – Bulatan Pahang. Yep, that was me. Sorry, people.
9. Uh, was always hungry still.
10. Jerawat invasion!!!! The whole face every nanometer square all covered!!

2000, 5 years ago – I was 30
1. Finally had the guts and sense to make a police report and end the sorry episode of the abusive relationship. Free at last! Merdeka! Merdeka! Could focus on career and school. Could actually live life! Life to me had just started! Hehehe…
2. Completed my master degree. Majored in Physics!!! Eeeewww! But I graduated! Yippeeee! But the Dewan Tak Cat must got burnt that year. So i was the only batch graduated at Bukit Jalil. Sheeesh...
3. Worked at a manufacturing concern. In charge of the R&D department. Finally able to indulge in my lifelong passion for knowledge and fascination with science and technology (bunyi macam bagus! Such ayat resume!!). Career was going real well.
4. Went to UK for two weeks. Spent the first week in London watching theaters almost every night. Spent the second week in Cornwall visiting the Heligan Garden and the Biome projects. My first trip overseas!!! Didn’t get to see snow though.
5. Met Yamtuan. He was at that time, a salesman for lab equipment. I bought water distiller unit and he bought me a ring! Unethical!! Tsk tsk tsk.. Got married not a year after we met.
6. Adopted two boy cats, Kit and Kat. Lovely boys.
7. Bought an apartment in PJ.

2005, now – I am 35
1. Working (but not quiet) in a university, still hopeful to get some funds to do a phd.
2. Blessed with Dot and Sun.
3. Writing again, my own editorial, except it is actually just in my own little blogspot called Anakikan. Yamtuan already called me Taik Blog, but don’t care.
4. Have weight problem. A serious one. Quoting Yamtuan – macam biskut rendam air.
5. Owe the dentist two wisdom teeth. They must be removed but haiya… am still traumatized. The demise of the first two was a terrible one. My mouth got torn at the sides! And the dentist arm dislocated… sob sob. This year, I promise you doc!

2010 – I will be 40
1. Will have lost all wisdom (teeth).
2. Will SO not gonna be in this shithole anymore. Instead I will be somewhere overseas with Yamtuan, both of us doing phds.
3. Will have another kid in tow. Another sunny son perhaps?
4. Will be able to afford a house with proper garden to plant all my serai pandan and cili padi.
5. Will have a driver’s license (anyone knows where to buy the terbang one?)
6. Will be slim (again) and pretty (again) and a hottie (again).
7. Will be able to afford sending mak and the family to hajj.
8. Will have my first children’s book published and sold millions of copies and translated into many languages – haha, a girl can dream.
9. Have enough money and gold to live comfortably.

2020 – I will be 50
1. Will be alive!! Family members from my side all go before their 50th birthday. I wanna live a bit longer so I can at least help Dot during her confinement. I want to live to be 70! At least 65!
2. Hair will be all white and I will be somewhat shorter (due to osteoporosis).
3. Work from home. But must have the children drive me to town once in a while to collect my royalty cheques (from the many many best-selling books).
4. Definitely slim and a hot chick still.
5. Do taichis in the morning and ballroom dancing in the evening and acrobatics at night.
6. Have my own NGO called Tree Huggers focusing on environmental education for the young.
7. Able to fulfil my earnest wish to help out on a regular basis at centers for special children – why, I dunno also. I have always wanted to volunteer there or hospice centers.
8. Have roads named after me.
9. Watch theaters and/or philharmonics every weekend.
10. Interviewing the children’s suitors and play the nasty Ibu Mertuaku role. Hehehe…

Well, as can be seen, my life has just only started. According to my maths and physics, i really am just 25! Oh the guy, the Kepala Anjing Loudness guy who supposedly had brain tumor? He is still alive today! Tipah Tertipu! Boohooohooo!

Now over to you Maya and Ummi and Hana Kirana and MamiJarum!!!

Oh and whoever read this akan terkena getahnya as well, so i expect your story on my table ASAP! Ye hear?


Blogger Kak Teh said...

OOD - too many, many things that I now know about you!! A very interesting life indeed - i was in a school gang once - called the Special Angels and later we morphed into the Mod Dots! I did have a close fiend, who did die of brain tumour.
I have been memed too - but u didnt read!

10:38 PM  
Blogger anedra said...

I didn't know you write children's stories! Tell me Tuah Si Landak someday ok??

and, girl, please drink lots and lots of milk. You really can't afford osteoperosis, you're too tiny already. Some more, what a waste of a hot chick (what u will be at 40 and 50) if she can't be seen cos she's too short, aye?!

11:51 PM  
Blogger anedra said...

oh..and all those lunches and all those car rides. and you didn't tell me 99.9% of this!

11:52 PM  
Anonymous hartini said...

How interesting! :D So funny that u were always hungry - how come?? *teehee*

Will write mine out soon :)

11:58 PM  
Blogger zaireen said...

Could not agree more! Last time, I was a member of Geng Nyamuk.. what a name huh? Partly because we were the last to come, either to class or dewan makan...

11:58 PM  
Blogger AuntieYan. said...

Ood, don't worry, being 50 is not that bad.I'm 50 now.If not for the osteoarthritis that had attacked me sometime in 2003, I think I still can play netball or badminton, or go for jogging....grey hair...yes, but not all white la....can put kala what???...I don't feel heart still 35!

1:25 AM  
Blogger OOD said...

i got there early, left a comment after auntyN tapi tak lekat!!

Special angels mod dots! haha... kak teh, at DBP just now came in one guy, with low fisherman's hat and jacket with collar put up so much so could not see his face. He was wearing jeans torn at the butt. Aiyah...He is a writer lah kak teh! Are you all interesting and mysterious like that?

i've bought one and it was wrong. Tomorrow i will go again to exchange.

i write kid stuff onny. Tahap hingusan onny.. And these shady past definetly not a lunch-or-car-ride topics. I would only scare you!

hartini DDDDD,
now also still always very hungry. After the babies, it gets roomier there, can stock up with more food and look like a walking rebana! Will check out your story!

1:59 AM  
Blogger OOD said...

nyamuks are pests!!! Sure you selalu annoy people ni! I spray you! Spray spray!

tell me lah your ayat and jamu!! Turunkanlah sikit ilmu? Hehe... i have decided no makciks that blog can ever be really makciks. No way!

2:02 AM  
Blogger Maya said...


Now its your turn to amaze me. What's with all these youngsters in the blogworld? All smartie pants. And a physicist ????? Is it even safe to be around you? :)

Very combustible - past, present and future. ALl that angst in the early years, the activism in the middle years and the future - a nasty Ibu Mertua. Be careful, this one is a wild one people! :)

But deep inside, well not so deep even, you are such a darling. I am sure will always be the one to stand up and be counted. Wish you and Yamtuan and Dot and Sun and Future Addtions wonderufl things and happiness.

Now abt meme-ing, it's not allowed, Ask Kak Teh, the Wise One. :) But if you insist, I have the unofficial ver - Version 4.9++ which should work after major debugging. Just for you

4:13 AM  
Blogger Ely said...

aah, acis!!!!!!!!!! i love him to death! he should have married me instead!

6:13 PM  
Blogger AuntyN said...

OOD : Cerita seram kata you? Ketaq kepala lutut baca cerita u ni, Hehehe.

Will do mine next week. But since there are so many interesting stories, mine will just be a so BORRRIIINNNG. So hope you all will not fell asleep half way thru.

Would definitely like to meet you someday..

6:28 PM  
Blogger AuntieYan. said...

Ood..."ayat" I got a lot. Must menuntut from me..."pengeras" pun simple je....if roti canai means, ayat pendek....if nasi beriani ayat panjang sikit...lagi besar pengeras, lagi kasi 'ayat' yang power!....:-)

Jamu, sometimes makan..but most off the time tak praktik pun.

I'll tell you (only you)eat a lot of ulam espeacilly yang pahit-pahit pucuk betik, peria, pucuk menggkudu....

...he...he...more secret to be revealed........(don't forget to siapkan pengeras!!!!)

7:55 PM  
Blogger OOD said...

combustible ya? Hmm... never thought of meself that way. You are probably right. I've mellowed down a bit, i hope. Ya?

And yep, kakteh did say in her spot that you are not allowed to bare all. Well, i was hoping to be lucky! Nemmind, that gives a perfect excuse to meet again, ya? face to face, must give latest updated version!

9:49 PM  
Blogger OOD said...

so you like Acis? I didnt because in one iterview, he said his hobby was watching arse. Cheeky! I was more into Kid!! U are right Acis and Sheila shouldnt be together. Sheila should marry ME instead! hehe..

AuntyN my senior ITM KSG!!
Kak teh tagged you kan? i tak pernah lagi tertidur reading your spot! If you gonna play tag, and i get to get a glimpse of the Real Auntie N, it will be like coffee i am sure!

very near my office is one whole farm of medicinal plants, segala mak bapak ulam can get there!! We must meet and i give you a tour around the Youthful Farm and you tell me which one for me to eat and which one only for goats. We each bring a basket and pluck pluck to our tummy's content!

I kid you not.

Sekeras-keras pengeras i will give!

You just pay me sewa bakul.

9:57 PM  
Blogger AuntieYan. said...

Kah!...kah!....Ood, imagine...we jalan-jalan in that Youthful farm. Me, like the nenek Kebayan macam dalam Sendayu Tinggi punya iklan tu (Mak Mah, mak Si Adlin)..and that pretty lady is you....he..he..dok mencari the right pucuk kayu for awet muda...!!!

10:13 PM  
Blogger hartini said...

Ood, forgot to mention. So proud that u were a tree-hugger. Hope u r still!!! :)

Me, just trying my best to help the environment. Wish I had time to be active in this. I guess one day when I become a bored housewife, I will :D

3:39 AM  
Blogger MA said...

Ood : wah, an interesting life you have thus far !

It's far better to hug a tree than a female-bashing dickhead kan ?

Stay cool !

8:25 PM  
Blogger izawani said...

Sama umur la kita... cos apa kat ITM 1990 tu ?
Me, CS 10 jer... until now using that CS 10 cert for my current job... and very sad... that cert missing when I moving to my new house... uwaaaaaa...

9:08 PM  
Anonymous Faizah said...

sekolah mana?? sc muar ke :D

6:34 PM  
Blogger OOD said...

mak mah aka auntie yan,
you cannot possibly be kerepot like THAT!!! hahaha...

oh and i just last week found out that you are a singaporean? residing in singapore. betul?

mak andeh,
you are right. Peluk pokok kayu is so much better than manusia kayu!

i ambik dip in science. Dok kat saroja mawi. sama tahun ka?

ayoyo... sains muor. Jawapannya adalah.... betul! Saya gandakan duit anda! Sama ke?

6:49 PM  
Anonymous Faizah said...

sama lah.. saya junior nih.. anak ikan LOL ... batch 98-99

8:12 PM  
Blogger izawani said...

OOD... yup... dok seroja gak... 93 grad.. masa tu satu bilik dengan ketua blok.. kak sapinaz (Budak CIMA)... kenal ?

If u wanna know me more, go to my page... or go here ME

Lama dah dok cari geng satu ITM.. :)

9:16 PM  
Blogger hana_kirana said...

ayoohh..... since the Internet is so bongok few days lately, i just discovered that i was tagged by u. alamakkk.... (punya la harap takde orang tag aku). D*ewan K*osmik eh? was involved with them only twice. no wonder your name sounds so familiar to me. :)

11:09 PM  
Blogger OOD said...

faizah junior!!!
meh sini wa kasi ragging.. ;o)

i grad 1991 lah. S1 320. Nengok gambar, tak cam lah, tapi boleh geng boleh geng, tak hal punya!

hana kirana,
patutlah blog pon lama tak update, maseh cerita air asia. Oh familiar ye? haha...
*oh aku famous!!! akhirnya!*

11:16 PM  

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