Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Tok Nah

This is my 100th post.

Tok Nah kembali ke rahmatullah selepas Asar hari Khamis, 26 Julai 2007 kerana sakit tua.
According to her IC, she was 79.

I last saw her during the recent famous flood of Kota Tinggi. She was fine then.

Then i heard she had a minor stroke, and was in and out of hospitals. I didnt visit her anytime during this period. A cousin called the weekend before her demise and told me that Tok couldnt recognise anyone anymore. She had visitors only visible to her eyes, and they were all relatives or her friends that have passed away. I was also told that Tok Nah had grown so painfully thin, she was just bones wrapped in tired skin.

I wanted to go kampung right away, i could feel that her time was near. But our car broke down and had to be sent to the workshop. The gearbox had to be changed and it would require the worksop many days to do it. And so i made Yamtuan promise that the next weekend, we would go back kampung and visit her.

On Thursday, the car was ready.

On Thursday, she was called.

Tak ada rezeki nak berjumpa.

Kami bertolak pukul 3 pagi hari Jumaat, 27 Julai. Sempat sampai, alhamdulillah.

Bathing her and then helping her into her last dress, was a sobering experience indeed. I could not help but remember how the roles were reversed. During the first few months of my life it was her who took care of me, bathe and dress me.

I am sorry for a lot of things. I love you, Tok Nah.

4 Comments:

Anonymous kna said...

Dear Ood,

Takziah and Alfatihah. My grandma is 79 years old too and she is waiting for her time to come. She has been bedridden for the last 3 years. Sometimes she recognized ppl and sometimes she didn't. I miss her rendang Nogori.


Rgds,

11:05 PM  
Blogger Nazrah said...

oh dear, is this the toknah u told me about?


takziah...i had no idea at the time. hope u are holding up ok

*hugs*

5:49 PM  
Blogger Hjh Esah Jolie said...

reverse role...something that I so not looking forward to, not in a bad way, just being very far from home...i just fear that everything is 'tak sempat'.

Takziah

10:15 AM  
Blogger OOD said...

kna,

thank you.
if we really think about it, no time is ever a good time for loved ones to depart, kan? As 79 year old as they may be....

thanks bro.

nazrah dearie,
yep, the same Tok Nah. I am cool, now. Hari tu, and many days afterwards i was 'not very cool'. But i am okay now.

I was told that in one of her few coherent moments, she and my mom had their time -minta maaf and say sayang. And she told someone too, that she knew i loved her despite me never being around for her. That was consoling.

Hope you're holding up ok too..
*hugs*

hjh EJ,
it's all perkara jodoh and rezeki kan? Duduk-serumah-tidur-sebantal pon is no guarantee untuk 'sempat'. We try our best and never take them for granted, but at the end of the day, it is His decision kan?

Have faith sistah! Semoga 'sempat' for come what may.

And thanks too.

2:02 AM  

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